Merry Christmas to everybody. And Happy Holidays too.
Heather and I have been thinking lately about the Santa Claus thing. Is it really ethical to directly lie to your kids about the existence of such a character? Why would a parent do such a thing? Is there anything to be gained in it?
My conclusion is that there is little harm and significant value and here's my argument:
What's the point of Santa?
Santa is just part of the magical atmosphere of the holiday. It can go too far, and I think it's important not to overdo Santa into a cultish obsession, but I think it's valuable for kids to have some fantasy around the holiday. An introduction to such enormous absurdity (flying reindeer?) is good for imagination and ultimately, I think, a good weird sense of humor, which is a thing of beauty.
But why cause the trauma of a lie revealed?
I'm not really worried about traumatizing the kids. In fact, any trauma caused will be limited. Any adult who claims to suffer an unhealed wound caused by the realization that Santa Claus is not real needs to snap out of it. Plus, little kids are not really in touch with reality anyway. They may believe that Santa Claus is real, but that belief is only a small part of the fantasy world of childhood. Pete also believes that the trains living on the island of Sodor can talk. Who knows what other beliefs, physical laws, and relationships govern his world? No parent tears their hair over having to admit to their kids that animals or trains can't really talk, so why should we worry about Santa, who is really a bit player in the world of kids. The fantasy is the beautiful part of childhood, and the disillusionment is the beautiful part of growing up.
What do you think?
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8 comments:
A good lesson in selflessness for the kids or the parents?
I like your spin on it. Santa doesn't die, he just gets refined from a being into a concept, suitable for maturing brains.
What do you mean, Santa isn't real???
Sounds like Rebekah (Dave's wife) has some tough conversations ahead of her. First Dave, then Luke.
3 cheers for santa. ok, he was a real guy. i mean, he has morphed, but this saint was born into wealth and he really threw bags of gold through this poor family's house to keep the kids out of prostitution and things of this nature (remember who my governor is now when i use that phrase). anyway, it's kind of like me being inspired by mother teresa. i thought she was still alive and she wasn't, but it didn't matter really. it was the spirit of it all and being dead or alive was just a detail. so santa as he originated is dead, but oh well, the spirit lives. which leaves the other part - so he's not around to give gifts. and like kids frickin care who signed the little gift card. they just want their snoopy snow cone machine.
p.s. merry Christmas
Tess and I have really struggled with this one. I grew up never believing in Santa, and tess was the opposite. Due to our parents view of the holiday. WE want to have our own traditions, so we settled on making the holiday focused on the TRUE meaning for the Christmas, and the Birth of Jesus. Focusing on the REAL Saint Nicholus and his good deeds is where we landed, instead of giving credit and belief to a jolly plump man whom freaks Owen out anyway. In the end it was a struggle because the imagination and magic of the North Pole and flying reindeer is good for a kids imagination. I just think the belief goes a bit to far these days, and takes away from the real Magic of Christmas. The fact that Christ was born in a manger is also a very imagination inspiring story. I could ramble on and on, but lets just ponder this last thought ... Santa and Satan have the same letters ... is one really trying to take away from the focus of the season?? now that is one for the imagination.
From what I've seen, Owen doesn't have an imagination problem anyway.
My friend's daughter Lynlie admitted recently that she realized the Tooth Fairy isn't real in about 1st grade, but kept mum for economic reasons. It was somewhere about 6th grade before her parents caught on...
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